what is 2 + 2

Thought started when I was reading an article by late Sujatha. He is one of the design member of the EVM(Electronic voting machine) and he was giving a 'fitting' reply for Jayalalitha's claim(after she lost in the recent elections) that these machines are flawned and always voted in favor of opposite party even the voter chose otherwise.

His arguments...

1. Same machines were used in the previous election, when the Jaya's party won - why was she silent then?

and a little more technical explanation is this...

2)Lets say you key in 2+2 = in a calculator. Can the result be vary in different places? i.e., 5 in chennai, 6 in bangalaore and 12 in Delhi ?? Jaya's claim is as good as saying "yes" to the above scenario

EVM is not a "programmable" device like a computer instead it is a pre-programmed device - like a calculator...

I was wondering what if we really make the calculators processing "subjective". Put various personalities 'inside' the calculator and ask the same question...!!! obvious reasons names are mnemonic 'ed


When asked what is 2+2 to our folks of course across heirarchy this is what the answer is.. (Yes this is fictional..actual would be more dangerous & creative !!!)

SP: 2 + 2. Check with Nn about this. We have to make sure we are meeting the customer deadlines. He had a similar requirement.(similar what !!!)
Thanks SP we will do that..

KM: Based on the last Q1 results and from irwin's (CEO) directions, our current target for this Quater is not focusing on such things. We may revisit this in latter Quater this year..(My god for 2+2, ok sir, we will come next quarter. At least don't give similar answer for the hike this year!!).

Besides during the slump of 2001 most of the employees asked the management to have them retained - even if it means a pay-cut. Situation in 2009 may become worse than this. However I have put my word to bb and top management, and made sure, jobs are secured first and ( then We may worry about 2+2 ?? ). As I always say project's interest comes above all personal interests.(Am still searching for the person who suggested KM for this question. Man am feeling like coming out of my appraisal Gyan.)

SH:As mentioned in section 2.3.4.5.3 in assumption section of the xyz DD (design doc) we have clearly documented this..
(Documented what ??)
That this functionality will not be changed in the current release.

If you expect anything else, then it has to be a CR. (CR - Change Request...will do !!!)

SV: I need to check this with the team, but is this a requirement to be handled post-golive?

I'll send you a rough (answer ?? )estimation for this by today.

CK: No no ..we have to do the impacting for this change request and as part of this we may have to institutionalize the process we are going to follow for check-in, followed by commit and roll-back steps.

But CK..this is about...

Hear me out completely...

(Completely...u have more...ayyoo..me abscond )

BH: mmm...I tend to support Tony's view on this, but still we expect a clear documentation about the process from the vendor(my company - if my niece, doing 4th class, hears this she would assume I'm a mango vendor.)

MH: Ok Peri, let me test this in test instance...

Me: I think we haven't changed this since last release. What is the problem faced now?

Product-Support: Can you send us the log files and which version of the product are you in?

Measurement of girl's..

"Sangam".. This is Ashu.

"A single word ?!?! Is that a restaurant? Indian Place? Any food stuff.." This is me and Mithun.
Ashu looked again the card in hand for a couple of more second and,
"We know this place." and we went there yesterday...
Meanwhile the chorus is screaming..."time-up"!!

Me, "Yesterday?...I didn't go out with you yesterday..."

Is it "Copper restaurant", Mithun.
"Yes but only the first part" , Ashu relieved.
Mithun, "Copper ?"
Ashu,"You got it man..it is Copper", Chorus faded away..and Ashu went for the next card !!
Mithun, "Yea, you mentioned this today morning about this place..That helped "

3 Points added to our score card.

Ok. This is what is happening there..We were all playing "Taboo" in Mithun's house, it was Thursday evening 8:30 PM and
it was a sort of send away dinner for Priyanka and then to me too !! Myself, Mithun & Ashu were guys and Pallavi - Mrs.Mithun, Eena - Ashu's Mrs and Priyanka were the other folks.
Team as you could have guesses Guys vs. Girls !! It was Mithun's idea to start some game before starting dinner..and we started reluctantly, to our surprise we all had a great time after a very long time !!

Game is simple, its similar to pictionary or dump-chaddars.Variation is you will be given a card which will have a word - personality, place, game, instrument, technical term, ,movie,book and what not but generally known words!!! Besides the words to be identified it also mentions 5 words which you should not use while giving clues.(In the last, Metal, gold were the key words that you should not use.) This makes it very interesting. you should use some other words and let your team identify the word. There will be a member from the opponent watching the card to make sure you are not using the key-words mentioned :) !! And you can finish as many cards you could in a given time, 55 seconds. After drawing a card you can choose to ignore (pass) and draw the next one...only 2 passes allowed .

Sangam is an Indian restaurant where we usually go and last night we went to a different place called Copper - little high-end. Hence the clue :)

Game gets more interesting when you are able to crack words in a different way..and sometimes very funny. !!

Now its Pallavi's turn and the word is "Mega Byte". Key words - "Computer, Memory, Harddisk,Storage,file.." Irony all of us are from IT background except Pallavi. Poor dentist she has very little choice of ideas to convey..
This is how it went...
"How do you Save things.."
Girls,"Save...where? what?"
Pallavi,"When you have important details how do you save..."
By now I started laughing ...
Girls are clueless.."Saving you mean in computer??"
Yes yes ...!!!
Ok..Hardisk...
Pallavi, "ahh...no..but close.."
Priyanka & Eena, "USB..DVD..CD...Hard disk ?"
No..not like that...its..Oh god What term you use :)...
By now all others realized it some technology crap and we are happy that it reached the correct hands :).
Floppy disk..
Blue Ray DVD..

No, no ...How do you store...actually..
Girls,"This is how we store .."
No, I mean,its no like DVD, USB and all...
She is trying to find the word, to convey...Size / capacity..but couldn't !!
Finally we make enough noise to make sure no better words strike her!

Its Mithun's turn now,

Mithun,"Its Action...stuff."
Me, "You mean is this a movie."
Mithun,Yes it is...Its an action Movie..
A huge scream from Pallavi, "No you can't use word movie"
Mithun "No, I didn't but they guessed it..after that I can..."
Ok, this time we won :)...in this fight..but still the word..
Me 'So its an english action movie..?'
Yes...
More clues?

What clues..Its a bus movie..!!!
Bus movie..what is he talking about...action...bus !! didn't strike us.
Its a famous bus movie man..what else can I tell you...
Hero..? any known persons.
No...I can't !!
okk..wait wait...bust movie is that "Speed"
Bingo !!!


We also had a lot of hilarious moments...
It was my turn..
It's a movie name.."You have got a mail" My heart pounded this is an easy Taboo..and my favorite too. You have to get his...
I started, "this is a movie..."
Before I could finish, Pallavi pulled the card from my hand and throw it down !!!
What, why ...then I realized "Movie" is one of the key word in the list...In the enthu of the movie name, I forgot to see the list of keywords. !!
Mithun and Ashu went mad on seeing me loosing such an easy choice.

Mithun's Best..
-------------------
The best one is...this
Mithun draw a card...
He stares at the card for a time more that his usal...
We shouted...thorow it away..go for the next !!!
But he didn't...
He started talking...
This is the girl's..
Girls !!! The crowd becomes very-curious and more than myself and Ashu were looking each other..
Girls what ??
After a pause for half a second,,Mithun continued...
It is the measurement...guys use..
We, Measurement !!!
Dude, you said Girl before. Is that still valid ?
Yes..and he continued..
Girls beauty is ...measured by....and he slowed down..
Me, "Are you saying girl's beauty is measured by this..."

Pallavi started laughing (she is overseeing the card) and started beating Mithun playfully. Others were really puzzled, including us, what the word is...
We were also wondering...what happened to this guy...talking non-sense. !!

Me, "Dude that's not a general scale machi....isn't that vary by place and person...Can that be universal ??" I didn't know any of that sort..Ashu You ???
Ashu, "No idea man..am zero in that...!!"

By now everybody started laughing and started pulling Mithun's leg.!!!

Mithun now realized what he meant and tried to correct but it added more spice to it Net result is same..
Still we didn't get any clue.(Want to know the word...hold on for a while !!)


YoKo ono..
-----------
It was my turn...and The word was "Rail" and I thought of passing it...and choose the next card.
It was "Loaf", It was not very difficult, easier than the previous, for me. So I thought of try the next card...Greedy what else.
Infact Pallavi whoz overseeing my card was surprise when I just ignored such 2 easy cards...!!
Third card..when I draw...before me..She started laughing...and on seeing my reaction the whole crowd went in to blast...

I have no clue how to convey this word..nor do I know what it means..I asked pallavi...do you know what this means...??
Pallavi...No, But all I know is, this is your last choice..and the crowd laughed again !!!
Me..My god this is unfair...how the hell am I going to do this...
Ashu and Mithun, Try something da...dont give up we have no choice and have some time too...do something..
I have no idea what this is...is this a name ? movie? place?
I thouht of desecting the word...but still how...where to start...
I said..guys..let me break the word...It sounds like some chinese word...This name is like Yahoo!! And then I have no clue to tell...
Pallvi..."Yahoo..where the hell yahoo is comming from..".

I finally gave up with 5 more seconds to spare...the word is "YOKO ONO". My team went mad when they knew I left Rail & Loaf only to find this YOKO ONO.
Mithun, 'Dude you need to be very carefull when you are chosing your bride .. '!! Yes good piece of advice !!

Other easy finds..
----------------------
I drew a card.. All the words you could think of to explain this was given in the key-word list, Easy word though.
Me, "What are the English months...start saying..Jan, Feb"
Ashu, "January, February, March.."

I interrupted and stopped Ashu, "that is the one.."

"March" ?

Now, this is a celestial object, in the sky, and it sounds like this month...
Ashu, "Mars?"
You got it. (Word is Mars, and the keywords are like 'planet','sun','earth','sky').

Other one..
Word is simple,Priyanka as verifying the card, was wondering how I would convey this..
I took a pause and said, "Start - opposite?"
Ashu "Stop" !!
That was really quick. (key words are like 'signal' and henceforth..)

We had a nice dinner that day. It was a vegetable pulav, white rice with egg-kurma (so much of egg and thick gravy) so tasty, Pallavi had really made a very nice dinner. How could I forget the starter,it was a very tasty Bhel poorri..I had two rounds of white rice and then Rasam. On seeing me tasting Rasam, they were wondering if I could have Sambar which was made the day before and refrigerated... I said...please,old Gravies are usally tastier..and yes it was really tasty. We finished dinner with a tasty dhal payasam (Paruppu payasam). So many tasty dishes in very short time, Lucky Mithun !!!

Well not so lucky that day..for the clue he has given a quite while. That clue became the talk of the day,infact for couple of days. The word for which he thought or clued as the measurement of girls beauty is butt. Even if I would agree with him in some cases, I won't generalize it and more importantly not in public :). Irony is the word in the card was indented to refer not the butt what we were talking, since it has 'cigarette' as one of the key word !! deceased minds all think alike ..God save Mithun !!!

It was a great fun and thanks for Mithun & Pallavi for inviting us !!